5 Powerful Mindset Changes

Parenting a neurodivergent child can feel overwhelming. You may have tried strategies from books, schools, or well-meaning friends and still feel like nothing works. Some days it feels like you’re walking on eggshells, just waiting for the next meltdown.

If that resonates with you, you’re not alone. Raising a child who processes the world differently, whether through autism, ADHD, or other neurodevelopmental differences, requires a new way of thinking. The good news? When parents shift how they see and respond to their child, home life becomes more peaceful and connected.

Here are five powerful mindset changes that can transform the way you parent:

1. From “Fixing” to Understanding

Many parents are told their job is to “fix” challenging behaviors. But behaviors are a form of communication. Instead of asking, “How do I stop this?” try asking, “What is my child telling me?”

When you shift from fixing to understanding, you create space for empathy, and open the door to real solutions.

2. From “Willful” to Skillful

It’s easy to assume your child won’t comply. More often, the truth is they can’t yet. Neurodivergent kids may struggle with executive functioning, sensory regulation, or social problem-solving. Reframing “won’t” as “can’t yet” allows you to teach skills instead of punishing deficits.

3. From “Chaos” to Connection

In the middle of a meltdown, it’s natural to want control. But connection is the real pathway to calm. Taking a deep breath, offering co-regulation, or using a predictable routine helps your child feel safe, which makes learning possible.

4. From “One-Size-Fits-All” to Individualized

What worked for your friend’s child, or even your other children, may not work here — and that’s okay. Neurodivergent kids thrive when support is tailored to their unique strengths and challenges. Flexibility is not “giving in”; it’s good parenting.

5. From “Hopeless” to Hopeful

It’s easy to feel discouraged when progress feels slow. But small, consistent shifts add up. Celebrating your child’s wins, no matter how small, builds momentum. Families who embrace hope often discover strengths they never expected.

Why These Mindshifts Matter

When parents begin to see their child through this new lens, the entire home environment changes. Tension decreases. Communication improves. And kids gain the support they need to flourish.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

At The Autism Resource Center, we help families just like yours find clarity, build skills, and create calmer homes. If you’re ready to start making these shifts, we invite you to take the next step:

Reach out for more information.

Every child deserves to be understood. Every parent deserves peace at home. And with the right mindset shifts, both are possible.

Autism and/or ADHD: What Parents Need to Know

Many parents come to us after their child has already been given an ADHD diagnosis, or because they’re trying to figure out if what they see is autism, ADHD, or both. These questions are common — and important. Because the symptoms often overlap, it’s not always easy to tell the difference. Understanding your child’s unique profile and knowing when to seek an evaluation can bring clarity, reduce stress, and open the door to the right supports.

That’s why we wrote this blog, to help families better understand the similarities and differences between autism and ADHD, and why getting the right evaluation makes such a difference.

Why the Confusion?

Autism and ADHD are two of the most common developmental conditions in children. Both can impact school, relationships, and family life. And both may manifest in similar ways: difficulty focusing, being “in their world,” or struggling to follow directions.

Research shows that co-occurrence is common; the CDC suggests that many children with autism also meet criteria for ADHD. That overlap often leaves parents unsure which evaluation to pursue first.

Autism Spectrum Disorder

Autism is defined by differences in:

Social communication (e.g., eye contact, conversation skills, reading nonverbal cues)

Restricted and repetitive behaviors (e.g., strong interests, reliance on routines, sensory sensitivities)

Early signs may include:

Limited eye contact or social smiling

Not responding to their name

Differences in play (lining up toys, unusual focus)

Distress with small changes in routine

Differences in sensory processing (very sensitive or under-reactive)

Autism is lifelong, but early identification and support can dramatically improve outcomes.

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

ADHD is defined by challenges with:

Attention (difficulty sustaining focus, easily distracted)

Hyperactivity (restlessness, trouble sitting still)

Impulsivity (acting before thinking, blurting out answers)

Early signs may include:

Constant movement or fidgeting

Frequent interruptions during conversations

Difficulty finishing tasks or following directions

Trouble organizing or remembering details

While autism centers on differences in social communication, ADHD centers on self-regulation of attention and behavior.

Key Differences Parents May Notice

Social interaction:

Autism → difficulty understanding or using social rules (e.g., not knowing how to join a game).

ADHD → understands rules but may break them impulsively (e.g., blurting out during a game).

Communication:

Autism → language may develop differently; conversations may feel one-sided.

ADHD → language development is typically on track, but conversations may be rushed or frequently interrupted.

Focus:

Autism → strong, intense focus on preferred interests.

ADHD → difficulty sustaining focus across tasks, easily distracted.

Repetitive behaviors:

Autism → reliance on routines, restricted interests, repetitive play.

ADHD → novelty-seeking; prefers variety over repetition.

When Both Are Present

Many children have both autism and ADHD. Studies estimate 30–50% of children with autism also meet ADHD criteria. This is called a dual diagnosis.

Why it matters:

If only autism is identified, ADHD-related supports (like classroom accommodations for focus) may be missed.

If only ADHD is diagnosed, social-communication interventions for autism may be delayed.

A dual diagnosis gives a fuller picture and helps parents, teachers, and providers support the whole child.

How Understanding Characteristics Helps Families

Getting the right evaluation is just the start. What matters most is how families use this knowledge in everyday life.

Processing Information Takes Time

If you know your child takes longer to process information, because they’re filtering background sounds, movement, and “noise” you can adjust.

When you repeat a question too quickly, it can restart their processing cycle. Instead of helping, it may add frustration, leading to behaviors that look like refusal or meltdown.

But when you understand this characteristic, you:

Pause and give extra time.

Use fewer words.

See behavior as overload, not defiance.

This shift reduces stress and helps your child feel understood and respected.

Skill Deficit vs. Behavior Problem

Sometimes what looks like a behavior issue is really a skill your child hasn’t learned yet.

For example, if your child doesn’t greet people when they arrive or leave, it might feel like rudeness. But often, children with autism haven’t yet developed the social skill of reciprocal greetings.

When parents see this as a skill deficit, they can:

Teach greetings step by step.

Provide prompts and celebrate progress.

Reduce frustration for themselves and their child.

Why an Evaluation Is Important

Autism and ADHD both benefit from early support, but the approaches are different. That’s why a comprehensive evaluation matters.

At The Autism Resource Center, we use evidence-based assessment along with parent input and rating scales to give families a clear, individualized understanding. Our goal is to move families from uncertainty to confidence, without the long wait.

Moving From Overwhelmed to Empowered

Whether it’s autism, ADHD, or both, understanding your child’s unique profile changes everything. It shapes how parents respond at home, how children are supported at school, and how families advocate in the community.

Getting clarity is not about labeling; it’s about opening doors to the right resources, strategies, and opportunities.

Serving families across Central Texas

Schedule your free consultation today: https://www.theautismresourcecenter.com/contact-us

References:

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2023). Data & Statistics on Autism Spectrum Disorder.

American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.).

Antshel, K. M., & Russo, N. (2019). Autism spectrum disorders and ADHD: Overlapping phenomenology, diagnostic issues, and treatment considerations. Current Psychiatry Reports, 21(5), 34.

Is This Typical? When to Consider an Autism Evaluation

Welcome to our blog. This is a space for parents, caregivers, and professionals seeking guidance, clarity, and trusted insight on autism and ADHD evaluations.

We’re beginning with one of the most common and important questions parents ask: “Is this typical, or should I be concerned?”

You’re not alone in asking this question. Many families find themselves navigating the space between developmental differences and developmental delays, unsure of when to seek help or what the first step should be.

Developmental Expectations Are Shifting, and That Matters

In 2022, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), along with the American Academy of Pediatrics, updated developmental milestone guidance for the first time in nearly two decades. These updates reflect what 75% of children are expected to do at certain ages, not what’s considered “average.” The goal: to help families recognize potential delays sooner and get the right support earlier.

For example, new guidance now expects that:

By 15 months, most children should be pointing to show interest and using at least 3 spoken words

By 24 months, children should say at least 50 words and combine 2 words meaningfully (“more juice”)

By 30 months, children should begin to play with other children and follow simple instructions

If your child is not meeting these milestones, or if you notice regression or unusual behaviors, it's worth exploring further.

What to Watch For: Early Signs of Autism Spectrum Disorder

According to the CDC and the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), early signs of autism may include:

Limited or absent eye contact

Lack of gestures like pointing, waving, or nodding

Delayed or absent spoken language

Not responding to their name by 12 months

Intense interest in specific objects or topics

Repetitive behaviors (lining up toys, hand-flapping, etc.)

Difficulty with pretend play or engaging with peers

These signs can appear in the first 18–24 months and may be more noticeable in social or group settings like daycare.

Why Early Evaluation Matters

Research consistently shows that early identification and intervention lead to better long-term outcomes in language, social skills, emotional regulation, and academic success (Zwaigenbaum et al., 2015; Dawson et al., 2010).

An evaluation doesn’t mean a diagnosis is guaranteed; it’s simply the best way to get answers.

At The Autism Resource Center, we use tools like the ADOS-2, behavior rating scales (e.g., BASC-3), and structured interviews to assess for:

Autism spectrum disorder

ADHD

Other developmental or emotional concerns

The process is collaborative, evidence-based, and focused on helping you understand your child’s needs and strengths.

You Don’t Need to Wait, Or Navigate This Alone

If you’re concerned, trust your instincts. You don’t need a referral to schedule with us, and evaluations are available for children as young as 18 months.

Whether you’re in Austin, San Antonio, or the surrounding Hill Country, we’re here to help you take the next step with clarity and compassion.

Ready to learn more or schedule a free consultation?

Contact us today, we’re here to support you.

References

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2022). Learn the Signs. Act Early. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/milestones/index.html

Dawson, G., Rogers, S., Munson, J., et al. (2010). Randomized, controlled trial of an intervention for toddlers with autism: The Early Start Denver Model. Pediatrics, 125(1), e17–e23.

Zwaigenbaum, L., Bauman, M. L., Stone, W. L., et al. (2015). Early identification of autism spectrum disorder: Recommendations for practice and research. Pediatrics, 136(Supplement 1), S10–S40.